Eileen's greatest prank ever
by melinda08
Summary: Future fic. Jason's sixteen and happier than ever. Peter and Paige are both out of the house, leaving him lots of free time for the computer, tv and video d the best part- Eileen Jacobson was moving. So why did what should have been the happiest day of his life seem like the worst? A christmas gift for crazysockmonkeys


**For crazysockmonkey, who's an awesome author anyways but whose wonderful Foxtrot story (I thought I was the only one in the world who still loved that comic!) inspired this, even if it's been a long time in coming.**

Jason Fox was your average 16-year old boy. That is, if by average one means Mensa-level intelligent, obsessed with computers (the technology, not porn), reptile-lover (RIP Quincy) and self-avowed hater of any kind of female attention. Even a kiss from his mom is apt to start World War 3.

The youngest of three, Jason now had pretty much free roam of the house, as his older siblings Peter and Paige (quite possibly the cause of Jason's animosity of any female) had both left for college. His father was still working, still at a mid-level company. What he actually did for a living, Jason had no idea. All he knew was there was once a time when Roger quit his job, thinking that his family needed him. Turned out, they needed him, all right. They needed him to work, both for financial reasons and for everyone's sanity.

His mom, Andy Fox, was all right. She could be hard-headed (especially when Jason wanted a new computer. Thanks to technology, that seemed to be every three months). For a pretty intelligent woman, she nonetheless drove Jason crazy whenever she did indulge in buying a new computer. All that mattered to her was how pretty the monitor and computer itself could be, not how practical it was. Women.

As much as Jason had prayed for his sister to leave the house, he almost was ready to admit to missing her- if not her company than her part on all of the thousands of pranks and insults directed at her over the years. Paige could be somewhat emotional, so no matter how much trouble he would get in (and Paige always told their mother on him) the resulting grounding would be well-worth it just to see her freak out.

Of course, Paige wasn't the only one prone to Jason's misdeeds. Once, when Peter had accidentally broke one of his models, Jason promised Peter he would get his revenge. That led Peter to jumping out the window, destroying their mother's flower bed, lying in dog stuff, missing dinner and being grounded for two weeks. The best part- Jason hadn't had to lift a finger in revenge.

There was Marcus, Jason's best friend and often his partner-in-crime. Always ready to babysit Quincy when the Fox family went out of town, Marcus shared Jason's passion for computers, technology and math. Of course there was science, too. In fact, one summer he and Marcus even convinced their families to pay for a summer at science camp. That could have been the heavenliest time of his life.

It could have, and should have, but there was only one little problem.

Eileen Jacobson.

0000

Eileen. How she drove him crazy! She teased, taunted, and even plotted against Jason over and over again over the years. The bad part- she always seemed to beat Jason at his own game, despite his "superior" intelligence.

She always liked to tease him about having some sort of crush on her. A crush? On a girl? That was ridiculous, to say the least. His thoughts were preoccupied with computers and science, not something as repulsive as girls.

She frustrated, irritated, annoyed and humiliated him over and over again.

So now that she was moving to another state, why did he find himself thinking of her?

0000

This was her last day, and for weeks he'd been avoiding her calls. He told his mom not much, other than how great life would be. How free and happy he could be. How fair any higher power might be.

Yet he'd never felt more miserable in his life.

0000

"Jason, you have a visitor!" Andy called out as she picked up the paper to work on her crossword puzzle.

Figuring it was Marcus, Jason ran downstairs ( he hadn't been doing much anyways) but was annoyed to see it wasn't Marcus who was calling on him. It was Eileen.

"Mom!" Jason shot Andy a dirty look, but she just smiled. "Eileen, how good of you to come by. Can I bring you some lemonade?"

"Mom!" Jason protest. "Eileen's not staying! She has to leave. She's moving today, remember?"

"That's okay- we're not leaving for a few hours. Lemonade sounds lovely, Mrs. Fox."

If Jason's menacing stare worked on her, Eileen didn't show it. Instead she received the glass of lemonade and went to the living room.

"Where are you going? You can't stay here!"

"I just received a new video game, and I thought you'd like to help me test it out," Eileen replied calmly.

"Driving with the devil? That doesn't even come out for a few more weeks! How on earth did you receive a copy?" Jason slapped his forehead with his hand.

"I guess some things are a mystery. What do you say, are you ready to get your fanny kicked by me one last time?"

"All right, all right. Just to do you a favor," he sighed as he grabbed the controller from her hand and sat down, where they proceeded to play for a few hours.

After getting his butt handed to him repeatedly, Jason was more than happy when Eileen announced that it was time for her to go.

"Thanks again, Mrs. Fox. It's been nice knowing your family-most of you, anyways!" Eileen laughed.

Andy just grinned. "Jason, don't you think it would be nice if you walked Eileen to her car?"

"Mom!"

"I guess I could call Mrs. Brown to let Marcus know about this little game-playing session you've had with Eileen."

Jason stood up. "Come on, Eileen. I guess I can walk you out. Mom, you'll be hearing from my lawyers! Aren't there laws about cruel and unusual punishment and torture?"

Andy just smiled knowingly as she went back to the kitchen.

At Eileen's car, no one said nothing for a few minutes. Finally, looking a bit down, Eileen started to get in her car. "I guess I should go, Jason. Unless there's something you want to say to me."

He said nothing.

"Jason, did you hear me? I said unle.."

"I heard you I heard you! What do you expect me to say- that it's been fun getting to know you over the years, that for a girl you're not too bad! That I've actually had fun with you, that I'll miss you?" Jason cried out. "I won't do it, I tell you! I won't."

Eileen smiled. "You just did."

His eyes widened. Rats, tricked again! How on earth did she do this to him time and time again?! He wanted to yell, to insult her, to tell her that he'd hate her forever for all of her pranks. But before he could say anything, Eileen leaned in, and to their surprise, she kissed him.

"Bye, Jason." And within seconds, she was gone.

He should be livid. He should have been repulsed. He should have been brushing his teeth with Lysol. Instead he found himself smiling. "Goodbye, Eileen."

Through the window, Andy and Roger had been watching the whole scene. Andy, with tears in her eyes, turned to her husband. "Our boy's growing up,isn't he?"

Roger, also visibly moved, couldn't speak. He just nodded, feeling an overwhelming sense of pride in his youngest son.

Andy, feeling quite moved, kissed Roger. When opening the door and witnessing that scene, Jason called out in disgust. "Yuck! Gross! Disgusting! Who wants to see their parents...kiss? That's just not right. You two are sick. Sick, I tell you!"

As Jason started running up to his room, Roger wanted to say something to his son. But Andy just pressed her finger against his lips, and they both returned, hand in hand, to the couch, where they both realized that after today, things would never be the same for their son. It was a huge day in the Fox household, one sure to not be forgotten.

The end


End file.
